Breakup

What does it mean to dream about breaking up with someone?

Everything I want in a man…

Dream: I dream about a man who is everything I want in a man, very loving, caring, sweet. He has dark hair, beautiful blue eyes, tall. I feel so happy when I am with him in this dream. I’m with a man I’m not happy with in real life. Is this dream telling me to move on and maybe someone like this will enter my life?

DreamsMaster: Our dreams are gifts from our innermost selves. When we’re unhappy in our waking world, our dreams often provide balance by providing us with an experience of bliss.

Is the dream telling you to move on? Will someone like this enter your waking life? My guess is that these are questions you’ve been pondering quite a bit these days, and the dream is shining a light on your heart’s desire. It’s also quite possible the dream is your intuition telling you that indeed, this man is out there for you. On the other hand, the dream could be more symbolic than literal, in that the man could represent an aspect of yourself that you need to become more intimate with in order to find a deeper sense of happiness in your life. Which of these possible interpretations do you feel fits best for you?

If your gut is telling you this dream is your intuition, the next step is up to you. It takes a lot of courage to trade the known for the unknown, and you’re the only one that can determine the right course of action for you. Your dreams are key to knowing whether or not you’re on that right course, even if life delivers some growthful challenges along the way.

If you’d like more focused guidance from your dreams, try this method called “dream incubation” – a technique I detail here: http://dreams.com/dreams-and-problem-solving

Trust your dreams – your Self – to point the way.

See also:

Middle of the earth was falling in…

Dream: My boyfriend and I have been fighting a lot lately. I had a dream that the middle of the earth was falling in and he was hanging on to my hand for dear life. I saved him and managed to pull him up and save him from being sucked in, and even though I saved him in the end he left me anyway. I saw my best friend standing there watching. She killed herself a year ago. Please help me interpret what’s going on.

DreamsMaster: My sense from the dream and what little you added about your waking life is that you may be harboring some guilt inside for not being or doing enough for the ones you love. In your effort to help (or save) your boyfriend or this relationship, you may have crossed a line into being the Rescuer, and when we cross that line, we can fall into the trap of the Rescuer > Persecutor > Victim cycle (google: Karpman Triangle), a psychological dance that can lead to resentment in relationships. This might be the source of the arguments you’ve been having with your boyfriend.

The “earth falling in” could be a metaphor for your sense that the relationship is losing ground. It could also be symbolic of your sense that your boyfriend is slipping away, not just from you but from life itself. In the dream, your trying to save him from being “sucked in” could mirror the waking world of your trying to save him from something you perceive is sucking the life out of him. This might be a real danger, perhaps an alcohol or drug addiction? If that doesn’t fit, think about what else you may perceive as a danger to him, which you may be trying in vain to rescue him from.

Your best friend who killed herself is watching. She might represent your fear that your boyfriend is killing himself (either literally or figuratively). She might also represent grief and loss. And abandonment. It’s a pretty intense thing to lose a best friend to suicide. This layer of the dream might be a message to you that try as you might, you cannot rescue others from themselves.

Think about where in your relationship you’ve been crossing the line between helping and rescuing, and take a step back. Ultimately, others must help themselves. Sometimes all we can do is love them through it. And sadly, sometimes a relationship does not withstand the fall.

Stay strong.

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It is in our idleness, in our dreams, that the submerged truth sometimes comes to the top.
– Virginia Woolf

Dreamed that my ex is pregnant…

Dream: I had a dream that my ex is pregnant… For 8 hours I had the dream replay over and over… In the dream I was approached by my ex… who I still love. She told me she was pregnant and we held each other… knowing it wasn’t mine. This is my worst fear… we were a family and she left with our son 7 months ago.

DreamsMaster: I see a couple of ways you can go with this dream. Before I continue, though, keep in mind that you are the only one who can truly interpret your dream, so trust your instincts to decide what fits best for you.

In the dream, your ex is pregnant with new life that isn’t yours. When the two of you split, was she involved with another man, or did you suspect that she was? If so, her being pregnant with another man’s child in the dream could be driving home the fact that she no longer has an emotional attachment to you.

If she is not actually pregnant or in another relationship, then the dream could symbolize the fact that she has embarked on a new life (represented in the dream by the pregnancy) that does not include you (the child growing within is not yours).

In either case, the core dream message appears to be that it’s time for you to let go of your denial and move on with the grief process toward acceptance of the loss of the old relationship.

It’s very significant that in the dream you held each other despite the fact that the new life inside her wasn’t yours. If your worst fear is that you won’t continue to have contact with your son, another key message of the dream could be that the more you accept or “embrace” you ex’s new personal growth or direction in life, the greater the chance you’ll be able to maintain a relationship with your son.

That this was a recurring dream means there’s a very important message your innermost self is trying to send to you. If you still feel in the dark about the dream’s true meaning, when you go to bed tonight ask yourself for another dream to shed further light on the message.

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Dreamt of my boyfriend with his ex…

Dream: Today as well as yesterday I dreamt of my boyfriend with his ex. I dreamt that his ex girlfriend with several babies ranging from newborn to around 3 years of age and pregnant came around and I was just pushed away and he unconditionally accepts her and her babies with open arms and seems happier than ever. I’m not sure where I end up but while he is at work I return to the place that he and she live that once I resided with him and what once was a home being a real house has now turned into a motor home parked on the curb of his mother’s house. He still works and she’s happy tending to the kids and expecting a new baby, although not his, he seems totally accepting of that and is happy. He’s in love and I step out of the picture because after all I being in love with him would never deny what I see in his eyes in his ways would never dream of interfering in his happiness.

DreamsMaster: It’s quite possible this dream is your innermost self delivering the message that it’s finally time for you to move on. “…what once was a home being a real house has now turned into a motor home” could be symbolic of this message of pulling up roots. In the dream he is surrounded by children and babies, new life. Perhaps you sense that he has genuinely moved on now, and it’s time for you to do the same. The fact that the dream has occurred more than once means it’s an important dream to pay attention to. Your inner wisdom is calling you to action.

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Ex in jail…

Dream: I had a dream I met my ex in jail.

DreamsMaster: Here are some ideas for you to work with…

First, is your ex in jail in the waking world, or was your ex in jail only in the dream? Also, what happened between the two of you when you met in the dream? Was it a warm reunion, or was there hostility?

If your ex actually is in jail, then dreaming of meeting there may mean that you have some unfinished business with him that’s drawing you there. How you felt in the dream may point to the nature of that unfinished business.

On the other hand, if your ex is not actually in jail, then take a look at what meeting your ex in jail might represent to you symbolically. For example, it could represent the feeling of being “caged” and lacking personal freedom in your relationship. Meeting your ex in jail could also mean that a part of you is still “imprisoned” or “locked up” in regards to old feelings for him. The feelings may be emotional attachment, or perhaps a lingering sense of guilt. If this rings true for you, the dream is likely sending the message that you need to release yourself from the past so you can move on to a more emotionally fulfilling future.